Joy in living comes from having fine emotions, trusting them, giving them the freedom of a bird in the open. Joy in living can never be assumed as a pose, or put on from the outside as a mask. People who have this joy don not need to talk about it; they radiate it. They just live out their joy and let it splash its sunlight and glo
w into other lives as naturally as bird sings.
We can never get it by working for it directly. It comes, like happiness, to those who are aiming at something higher. It is a byproduct of great, simple living. The joy of living comes from what we put into living, not from what we seek to get from it.
Stan: I won 92 goldfish.
Fred: Where are you going to keep them?
Stan: In the bathroom 。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath? Stan: Blindfold（蒙眼睛） them! =================================================================== 斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。 费雷德：你要在哪里养他们？ 斯丹：淋浴室。 费雷德：可是你要洗澡的时候该怎么办？ 斯丹：蒙上他们的双眼！
② The Revenge 蒙骗的成本
Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: “When I’m dead I want you to marry farmer Jones.” Wife: “No, I can’t marry anyone after you.” Johnson: “But I want you to.” Wife: “But why?” Johnson: “Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!” =================================================================== 农民罗伯特就快死了。他的亲人都立在床前。他响声浑厚地对爱人说：“我去世后，估计你嫁给农夫鲍比。” 老婆说：“不，在你去世后，我不能嫁给了所有人。” 罗伯特：“但希望你那么做。” 老婆：“为何？” 罗伯特：“由于鲍比曾在一笔贩马的买卖中蒙骗了我。”
③ I think that I’m a chicken 我觉得我是一只鸡
Psychiatrist: What’s your problem? Patient: I think I’m a chicken. Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on? Patient: Ever since I was an egg! =================================================================== 精神疾病医生：你哪儿难受？ 患者：我觉得我是一只鸡。 精神疾病医生：这样的事情从何时逐渐的？ 患者：从我还是一只蛋的情况下逐渐。
④ How do I get the gum out我如何把泡泡糖取下来
Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their ears from popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, “I’m meeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?” =================================================================== 当空姐给旅客们发泡泡糖的情况下，她表述说泡泡糖有利于她们避免耳呜。飞机着陆后，一位旅客跑到这名空姐眼前，讲到：“ 我立刻就需要看到我妻子了。我怎样才能把泡泡糖从耳朵里取下来呢？” 文本文档冲亿季，好宗庙相伴mini ipad移动盘拍立得百度搜索背包
⑤ Where Am I 我在哪儿
An Englishman lost his way while he was driving in the countryside. He saw a farmer working in the field nearby, so he went nearer in his car and asked the farmer, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” “Yes, ” the farmer looked at him strangely and said, “you are in your car, sir.” ================================================================= 一个英国在乡下驾车时迷路，他看到一个农户已经周边的田里干活儿。因此他就把车开以往问这位农户：“劳驾，您能跟我说现在我这也是在哪里吗？” “可以。”农家怪异地看了看他，随后讲到：“你如今在你的车辆里，老先生。”
⑥ Why do you never phone me?你为什么不帮我通电话？
Mrs Harris lives in a small village. Her husband is dead, but she has one son. He is twenty-one and his name is Geoff. He worked in the shop in the village and lived with his mother, but then he got work in a town and went ant lived there. Its name was Greensea. It was quite a long way from his mother’s village, and she was not happy about this, but Geoff said, “There isn’t any good work for me in the country, Mother, and I can get a lot of money in Greensea and send you some every week.” Mrs Harris was very angry last Sunday. She got in a train and went to her son’s house in Greensea. Then she said to him, “Geoff, why do you never phone me?” Geoff laughed. “But, Mother”, he said, “you haven’t got a phone.” “No,” she answered, “I haven’t, but YOU’VE got one!” ==================================================================桑德斯女性住在一个小村庄。她的丈夫死了，但她有一个孩子。他是二十一，他的名字是杰夫。他曾在店本质村内住在一起，他的妈妈，但之后他获得了工作中，在一个小鎮，前去小蚂蚁日常生活在那里。它的名称是绿海。这是以他妈妈的村子较长的路要走，而她却开心不起來这件事情，但杰夫说，“沒有合适我的国家，妈妈哪些稳定的工作，我能在绿海获得了很多钱，每一个礼拜送你一些。“桑德斯女性很生气的最终一个星期日。她取得了在一列火车，来到她孩子的房屋在绿海。随后，她告诉他：“杰夫，你为什么从不打我的电话？”杰夫笑了笑。 “可是，母亲，”他说道，“你没有收到一个电话。”“不，”她回应，“我并没有，但你有一个！”
⑦ The Same Action Yields the Same Result同样的项目投资同样的結果
A couple of hunters chartered a small plane to fly them to a forest, and made an appointment with the pilot to come back and fetch them in about two weeks. At the end of the two weeks, they had shot a lot of animals that they wanted to load onto the plane. But the pilot said, “This plane won’t be able to take more than one wild buffalo. You’ll have to leave the others behind.” Then the hunters protested, saying, “But last year, another pilot with the same airplane let us take two buffalos and some other animals in the plane as well.” So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical, but finally he said, “OK, since you did it last year, I guess this year we can do it again.” Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring area. The three men climbed out and looked around, and one hunter said to the other, “Where do you think we are now?” The second one surveyed the area and said, “I think we’re about one mile to the left of the place we crashed last year.” ====================================================================== 有两个猎人兽包机价格前去一座山林，到了之后，她们和航空员承诺好两个星期之后接。两个星期后，她们秒射很多小动物，并且准备把这种小动物所有搬上那架小飞机，但是航空员说：“这多架除开 一头野牛外，没法再多载了。你们务必把其余的猎食都留有。” 猎人兽说：“可是上年另一个航空员开一样的飞机场，就要大家带二只水牛，也有一些其它的小动物上机操作！” 由于她们那样强烈抗议，因此那一个新航空员想了一想后，虽然或是有点儿有疑问，最终或是让步说：“行吧！假如上年可以保证，2021年应当还可以。”因此他装了两边水牛和一些其它的小动物。結果飞机飞行五分钟后，就掉落在相邻的地区。这3本人从直升机钻出来看了看四周，在其中一个猎人兽对另一个说：“你认为大家如今在哪里？” 那人瞧了一下，说：“我觉得大约间距上年飞机坠毁的地区西面一英哩远！”
⑧ Chief is at the wedding 首长在婚宴上
A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. “But officer,” the man said, “I can explain.” “Just be quiet,” snapped the officer.”I’m going to put you in jail until the chief gets back.” “But ,officer, I ….” “I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!” A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.” “Are you sure?” answered the man in the cell. “I’m the groom.” ====================================================================== 大街上的一个超速驾驶者被警员拦下了。“可是警察”这个人讲到，“我能表述的”。 “保持安静”，警员忽然讲到。“我将将你送到牢房，直到首长回家。“可是，警员，我，，，”。 “我讲过去了保持安静，你需要到牢房了。”几个小时后，警员向牢房里看了看讲到“算你好运气，由于大家的首长已经他闺女的婚宴上。他将带上一个开心的情绪回家的。” “你确定”在监狱里的这个人讲到。“我是新郎官呀”。
⑨ Who Is the Laziest 谁最懒
Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class? Tom: I don’t know, father. Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work? Tom: Our teacher, father. ====================================================================== 爸爸：哎，汤母，今天我跟你们教师谈过，如今我觉得问你个问题。你们班里谁最懒？汤母：我不知道，父亲。爸爸：啊，不对，你了解！回过头来，当其他小朋友们都是在写作业、写毛笔字时，谁在课堂上坐下来，仅仅看人家做功课？汤母：大家教师，父亲。
⑩ Two Birds 两只鸟
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer. Teacher: Please tell us. Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. ====================================================================== 教师： 这里有两只鸟，一只是麻雀鸟。谁可以强调哪仅仅小燕子，哪仅仅麻雀鸟吗？学员：我指出不来，但我明白回答。教师：请看看。学员：小燕子边上的便是麻雀鸟，麻雀边上的便是小燕子。